Get a Jumpstart on New Year's Resolutions

Connecticut Cookie Company Confetti Cookie

How to Cheat Get a Jumpstart on New Year's Resolutions by Thwarting the Efforts of Others

New Year's Resolutions run the gamut of personal goals in a typical spectrum from losing weight to swearing less frequently in front of the kids. But let's face it: the root of all resulotions is to better one's self. To look at it from a different angle, this is really a polite way to express your goal to be better than everyone else.
So to keep up with the Joneses, let's try thwarting their progress instead of working so hard on our own. “I'd like to lose ten pounds” can be reinterpreted, focused outward to more directly state, “I'd like to be thinner than you are.” The simple, time-saving way to achieve this is to send al of your loved ones cookies. Quick Fix is impossible to resist, so start there, quickly followed by a second “Happy New Year's – You Are Important to Me” care package of Choco and Toffee Chunk.
Let's use basic math to support (indisputably prove) this thereom:
x = your weight in pounds
y= your rival's loved one's weight in pounds
n = some non-specific number of pounds
We start, to keep it simple, with x = y, but we WANT x < y.
x - n ≠ y
x ≠ y + n
By this method, it's clear to see that x ≠ y + n is also accurately depicted as x < y + n. Now the new y is greater than it was and you win.